Biology, revisited

WARNING: This post contains a recount of an extremely gross event. If you are eating anything right now (especially mangoes), please save the reading for later when you have digested your food.

I took a shower after doing my business in the toilet. While cleaning up the holemostofyoupervertswanttoenterthemost, I brushed against something. I tried scrubbing it vigorously with my index and middle finger – didn’t work. This seems to be one hell of a stubborn piece of shit! I thought, and scrubbed even harder. Then it occurred to me that it was not something stuck on the rim of my anus. It was something dangling out of it.

I tugged at it, because hey! What else could I do? Leave that hanging there until the next time I want to excrete? It was disgusting I tell you. I pulled out nearly 3 inches of that thing, and throughout the whole time? I just felt all weirded out.

It was like I was doing what nature was supposed to do for me naturally. Tugging out your own shit is basically not one of the involuntary reflexes. But I did it anyway.

Turns out it was the fiber from the mangoes I consumed just this afternoon (I had to check in case it was a worm or other). This hereby proves what we have all learned in high school – fiber is not digested by the stomach because we’re not cows!

But I guess my fiber didn’t co-operate with the rest of the bulk of my shit.